ph. mb. pt. seven- B street skatepark

May 2009

I'm so grateful that I grew up with skateboarding in my life. When I was about nine years old one of my best friends that lived up the street started skating and I thought it was the coolest thing ever. I remember at that age, that's all I thought about, skateboarding. All I wanted to do was learn new tricks and learn how to ollie up the curb. When I was about twelve years old, my mom was okay with me leaving the neighborhood and going skating.

Skateboarding was great because each day I would go further and further with my friends and that's when I really explored this town that I lived in. I got to see every single piece of it, every detail, every pothole, and I picked up my street smarts around this age. I really learned how to get around in my own environment and I never had that anxious feeling of being lost ever since.

In college, my skateboarding became an outlet to ease my stress, to forget about school for an hour, for a day. And I still explored, that's all I did on my days off, I would just take the buses to nearby cities and skate around until my legs were numb.

I remember on this particular day I found the nicest surprise, after skating around downtown Hayward I decided to go a little further west to an area that I'd never been to. On B street which was only about three miles from my house, I found a skatepark tucked away right by a elementary school and in between a huge park. I literally lived only fifteen minutes away on my board. This became a regular spot for me. I was always known as that guy with the really bright beanies. I remember taking this picture and sending it to Xavier because I was just so excited that this was in the same city as us. 

If it wasn't for skateboarding, I would've been a mess in college. So stressed out all the time that I couldn't even function. I still feel this way until this day, the feeling of being so relaxed and so free while just riding on my board. Also I don't stress about skateboarding anymore, all I have to do is just cruise and ollie up a few curbs here and there and I'm one happy camper.

ph. mb. pt. six- Roommates and adventures

March 2009

This is the first year Xavier and I lived together, along with three other friends in a two bedroom apartment right by campus. I actually really liked all of my roommates, there were weird times and a few conflicts here and there but overall, we all had good relationships during this time.

Xavier showing off his cookie/milk mustache. I'm proud and happy that we lived in such a clean, tidy, and organized apartment. I'm glad that we all were clean people that picked up after ourselves and that we all did our weekly chores every single week, or at least we were forced to be. That whiteboard behind Xavier was pretty important because we would write down important messages, post up house bills/rent, write love notes and reminders and other silly things. 

I shared a room with Andrew(not pictured) and Xavier. While Chao(pictured) and Stuart shared another room. I thought it was so funny how Chao and Stuart were probably the most incompatible people in the apartment and that they shared a room together. But it worked out just fine, except when any of us weren't talking to the other, then it was weird.

Towards the end of March, Chao, Xavier, and I went on a trip to Santa Cruz to stay with Chao's sister and sisters husband for the weekend. This was my first time in Santa Cruz and the same for Xavier. We spent a lot of time in downtown and too much time at the beaches. That's all I really remember from the trip. Oh and the best part of it all was sleeping in this weird attic and all three of us hit our heads on the ceiling at least once! And that Chao's sister and sisters husband were the nicest people ever.

This was taken from an Egon Schiele book at some random bookstore in downtown. I've always been obsessed with the way he drew his hands, it was always the hands that got me.

On our last day of our trip we decided to travel south to the city of Monterey. Xavier and Chao almost rented kayaks but I remember it being a little too expensive so we just ended up hanging out on these cliffs and looking at this amazing view.

That was such a great year, and such a period of immense growth for me and I'm sure for all of my roommates. Xavier and I ended up going our separate way from the rest of our roommates and found a small place near downtown. It was just as the summer was ending, and there were hard feelings but I hope that those are all gone even though I don't talk to a couple of them anymore. I'll always remember that year, and all the great times that I had with all of my roommates, and I'm so thankful for them and I'm glad we shared so much and learned so much from each other.

ph. mb. pt. five- These Routines

May 2009

This was my last quarter of my Junior year in college. I remember being so nervous about becoming a senior. I knew things were going to be so different, I just never knew how different until it was over. This was my third year away from home and my idea of home started to change around this time. I was living in a two bedroom apartment with four friends that I really cared about that somehow became my family. I remember these days were so routine but so free at the same time. If I didn't have class, work, or work to make, I did a lot of "routine adventures", things that were so mundane but didn't quite fit in my day as routine.

What I always really liked about my school was the view, we always had a pretty cool view. 

I was pretty proud of this, I think my roommate was bragging about being on the dean's list and I remember checking to see if my name was there and it was! 

Waiting for the bus always gave me enough time to take pictures like this, I remember on this particular day, one of my classes let out really early and I made a trip to oakland to check out some galleries and do some exploring. I remember I found out on this day that there was a skatepark in Hayward that was right down the street from our apartment. This changed EVERYTHING!

"When I Grow Up" 2009 Mixed Media

This was one of three panels I did, I did this triptych for my painting class at the time. My friend Kenneth now has two of them and a woman who works at the college bought the other one.

I think unknowingly until I moved away from Hayward, my favorite thing about the end of my day at school was riding home on the bus. Most of the time, the bus was really empty and I really liked that, it was always a nice way to end a long day. These routines became so normal to me, I miss these particular routines but I'm finding new ones now and I'm learning so much from them. 

ph. mb. pt. four- Critical Mass

March 27, 2009

critical mass |ˈˌkrɪdəkəl ˈmæs|

noun
-the minimum size or amount of something required to start or maintain a venture.

Critical Mass in San Francisco was a bike ride of about 400 people on the last Friday of each month. The point of critical mass was to show that bike riding around the city is possible and anyone can do it, and to make more people aware that the roads are for bicyclist as well. This was the main idea behind critical mass but the more and more I went those these, the more and more people would abuse this amazing event.

A group of 400-600 people on bikes was a pretty amazing sight and on a Friday night, you could just imagine how much traffic it caused. It was great to see all kinds of ages and types of people, so many people in the bay area use bikes as their main mode of transportation but like in any other city, there are much more cars, so usually, it would be a mixed review. Motorist that were on the road would be frustrated because of the traffic and bystanders would cheer on the crowd.

With any event like this, there will always be those handful of people that do something inappropriate to spoil the entire event for everyone or even give critical mass a bad image. Whether it was drunk people riding bikes, or people yelling violently at motorist, bicyclist surrounding a vehicle (which happened on multiple occasions because the motorist would try and drive into the crowd to get by but would always end up being trapped), or whatever else that was more of a negative aspect than a positive one always seemed to happen every month.

Other than the negative aspects, I always looked forward to the last Fridays of every month. It always felt nice because I was sharing something so simple and awesome with hundreds of people. And riding in tunnels are just so much fun!

ph. mb. pt. three- one million miles per hour

Potential 2009

This was a painting I did during my Junior year. At this time, there were so many things running through my head. So much going on at one time. Was I doing what I really wanted to do? Was this program for me? Is this the right school to stay at? Am I good enough, am I making the right decisions?

Those were just a few questions on top of numerous amounts of questions that I had. It came to this point where I was mentally/physically exhausted from always spending so much energy on so many things at once. I was tired, stressed, unhappy.

I made this piece to talk about how our thoughts, emotions, and actions are heavily influenced or easily influenced and what can come from that. What are the consequences of it? The television for a head represents the idea of influence. The television is a outlet or source of knowledge or lack of knowledge that influences so many of our own personal traits or how we perceive the world. How something so square, and simple can cause us to react in such intense ways.

The tentacles represent thought, our thoughts, the thousands and thousands of thoughts that we have, that are fragmented and tangled but can be traced back to us. I started to realize at this time that if I just sat with my thoughts, on an individual basis. I could confront and deal with each question/problem one at a time without feeling exhausted or overwhelmed. When I started to do this, I realized I was looking at the root of my problem, where it started and where it could eventually end up. And I felt enlightened, something so simple really helped me to realize that healing myself and my stress/frustration/confusion was possible.

The string that is being held onto is a symbol for how we hold onto things that sometimes don't really have that much weight, that we sometimes perceive our problems, our plight, to be much more significant than they really are. The light bulbs represent that enlightenment, that realization that I can do this.

It's nice to revisit old pieces like this and reflect and compare my current life now. I have to remember that a burden is only heavy when you let it stay on your shoulders for too long. You can set it down, you can share it, and eventually it will wear out and it will be completely gone.

ph. mb. pt. two

   I remember taking the same route back to the apartment after class every single day. I remember my last class got out right as the sun was setting. I was always so awed by the lights, shadows, fleeting warmth, pending cold. And I remember that sunset was a constant reminder that I am alive, that I'm so damn lucky.

   Going through all these old photos is nostalgic to say the least. Chao was a really good person, and I miss her dearly. The first day I met her, we became best friends right away. I listened to her, she listened to me, we just had this comfortability with each other that was really rare with others. It was nice to have her as a roommate, I learned so much from her. I always thought of her as my sister, a sister that I would confide to, that I loved and that I cared for.

 
   Junior year, March 2009. This was towards the end of my winter quarter and this was the first piece I made after being accepted into the BFA program. I remember being so nervous because I knew that the BFA program was a big deal, that all my art professors from that point on mentioned it at some point. I'm so thankful that I had professors/mentors that helped me reach this point and encouraged me to apply for the program.

   I wanted to work on a piece that summed up my personal issues I was going through at the time. I've always had self esteem issues, I've always been self-conscious about my looks, I've always been insecure about plenty. This was a project to confront those issues, to confront what had been building up for years, or as long as I could remember.

    So I decided a self portrait was the route to take since this was about.. myself. I thought to myself, when is the only time I look in a mirror? And then I realized that I see my face when I'm brushing my teeth. So I came up with the idea of drawing two portraits of myself on my page of me brushing my teeth. One pencil drawing representing the "real" me, how I really look. And the other drawing which was fully painted in gouache to represent how I saw myself. So I exaggerated my features, I made my face longer, I made my nose bigger, I changed everything about my face and body.

 
   Then I hung up the pieces on a grid format. I used two projectors to project an image of two reference photos that I drew from. To further project that idea of my "real self". I was so happy with how this project came out. My intention was for the viewer to walk in front of the projector to look closer at the drawings and to project their own shadow/body/image onto the wall. Further propelling this idea of self image.

   This was on of my first pieces that I felt helped me get through some real issues that would bothering me for so long. I actually ended up feeling like I had nothing to worry about, realizing that I am me, and there is no need to worry about just being myself. This was also the first piece I ever made for my first BFA critique, which turned out to be a really good and fun critique.

ph. mb. pt. one

So I want to start a new segment with my blog. The phone/mobile pictures segment. I had a dinky little sony phone back in 2008-2010. I used the camera on that phone until finally, the phone broke. And to give you a sense of how "dinky" it was, it was a slider phone that was about five years old already when I got it. I ended up taking a lot of photos with that phone so here is part one of this new segment. I hope you enjoy these random photos and winded stories.

Living in the bay area, the weather was mostly gloomy for elongated parts of the year, so this umbrella became my best friend. I remember it has these holes in the middle that would catch the wind in a certain way so the wind wouldn't knock over the umbrella. I think also having a rainbow umbrella was sort of an interesting social experiment. I always had people stare at me a little different, goes to show how symbolism is etched into our daily lives.

This was my junior year of college so I was spending all of my time at the art department, but sometimes I would go off somewhere on campus to just take a break and enjoy the little amount of sun we did get. I always had these big headphones with me every single day, I was sort of an introvert at this time so listening to music constantly when I wasn't in class was sort of my escape or wall I put up.